🧠 Bitcoin ETFs make other ETFs look like 💩

Today’s email is brought to you by The Santorini Halving party - THE Bitcoin party of 2024 (you don’t want to miss it)

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Good morning - Arsen here. ☕

Welcome back to Bitcoin Therapy. We’re like your Bitcoin wingman - we’ll make you look smart in front of the girls.

First, happy and relaxing Sunday to 5,112 patients reading today. 👋 

It’s been a busy week. Good busy, but still.

Also, looking to work in Bitcoin? I co-wrote this article that might help you.

Is it good advice or b*llshit? Let me know by replying to this email :)

Alright, here’s what I got for you this week:

  • Fake Bitcoin news sends a “gold miner” ballistic

  • The EU want to ban Bitcoin self-custody?

  • Bitcoin ETFs make other ETFs look like 💩

Estimated read time: 3 minutes and 13 seconds

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Alright, let’s Bitcoin…


Gold miner Nilam Resources announced their plan to buy 24,800 Bitcoin.

The result? Their stock went up 1900%.

This is massive. Huge. Humongous. Super-mega-flippity-duper news.

There is only one tiny issue: it was all fake. Falsa. Falsch.

  • The “gold miner” is actually a penny stock with close to no volume

  • Their market cap is $5M - there is no way they could afford 24,800 BTC

Gold miner? More like one toothless man in a stream with a pan. 👴

So, why the announcement? Here are a few options:

  1. It was a genius PR marketing strategy

  2. Social media intern decides to pull a prank on their last day

  3. The owners decide to pull off a good ol’ pump and dump

I think it’s number 3 because it gets wilder: the day after the announcement, the CEO of Nilam Resources resigns.

My spidey senses are tingling. 🕷️

This reminds me of that one time in 2017 when a company called ‘Long Island Ice Tea’ changed its name to ‘Long Blockchain Corp’ and went up over 100%.

Oh, and they were also charged with insider trading and delisted from Nasdaq for this little “pivot.” Lmao.

But, this case is proof that the MSTR blueprint is not going unnoticed:

  1. Start any company

  2. Make it work

  3. Get it listed on the market

  4. Announce you will buy Bitcoin

  5. Become a Bitcoin investment holding company

  6. Profit from the bitcoin holdings and share price appreciation

We’ll be seeing a lot of companies copy Mike’s playbook,



Can you feel it? Something big will happen in a few months

Correct, the Bitcoin 2024 halving - a once-in-a-lifetime event.

But let me ask you this: Where will you be when the Halving happens?

If the answer is not ‘partying with bitcoiners…you’re doing it wrong.

That’s why you MUST go to the Santorini Halving Party on 12-14th April 2024 (soon).

My friend and local Greek George is the brains behind the Santorini Halving Party.

And trust me, when it comes to kick-ass events and George, you’re in good hands.

Here’s why you should go:

  • Held in sunny Greece on a beautiful island ☀️

  • You get to play Bitcoin video games with bitcoiners (like this one)🎮

  • Educational workshops and a great lineup of speakers 🔊

  • A mixology class where you get to learn to make delicious cocktails 🍹

  • Pizza party by the pool 🍕

Are you feeling the FOMO yet? Good, because you should be.


You know the game of Telephone?

Well, this week, we saw a prime example of how a rumor escalated Bitcoin Twitter into pure chaos and drama.

Here’s what it felt like:

The Rumor: The EU is banning self-custody wallets and anonymous transactions

The EU passed a new regulation proposal called AMLR (Anti Money Laundering Regulation).

Now, these proposals are not exactly sci-fi that keeps you on the edge of your seat. I’d rather watch paint dry than read them.

So what do you do? You wait for someone else to read it and give you ELI5 (explain it to me like I’m five).

And that someone is not me. It’s Patrick Hansen who broke down what this new proposal means for EU bitcoiners.

Spoiler alert: the rumors are false, and the proposal changes nothing

Here’s the TLDR:

  • Exchanges need to do KYC (identity verification) - nothing new here

  • Exchanges cannot serve anonymous users - nothing new here

  • Exchanges cannot list privacy coins - nothing new here

  • Exchanges will need to do blockchain analysis to collect info on users - nothing new here

The AMLR does NOT ban:

  • Self-custody transfers

  • Self-custody wallets

  • Private Bitcoin transaction

TDLR x2: Almost nothing changes. You will be able to use your self-custody wallets

Now, it’s important to stress that the EU cannot ban self-custody, even if they wanted to.

They cannot ban you from memorizing 12 words.

But, exchanges will keep spying on you using third-party blockchain analysis tools.

This is why I recommend you coinjoin your Bitcoin with Wasabi Wallet to keep your Bitcoin private.

You can read Patrick’s full thread here.


 1/ Bitcoin ETFs see strong inflows this week

We’re so back, baby!

Last week, we saw a dip in ETF inflows: $888M in total net outflows.

But just like your delish guacamole dip, Bitcoin dips don’t last forever.

This week, we saw $900M in net inflows.

Talk about reversal. It reminds me of when I was firmly against getting a cat. Now, I am a #catdadforlife.

But why should you care? Well, because:

  • Bitcoin ETF inflows = price go up (usually)

  • Bitcoin ETF outflows = price goes down (usually)

2/ BlackRock’s Bitcoin ETF is the fastest-growing ETF in company history

Larry Fink has launched a lot of different ETFs.

But only one brings a smile like this to his face:

Is it iShares Core MSCI EAFE ETF?

Is it iShares IBoxx USD Investment Grade Corporate Bond ETF?

No. It’s the Bitcoin ETF.

Bitcoin is up 150% since he started talking about it. Just look at that smirk.

Larry knows there’s a ton of demand from investors. And now, so do you.


  • A Chinese takeaway worker gets arrested with 61,000 BTC. Her crime? Not putting napkins in the bag.

  • New crypto-malware is targeting Call of Duty player and stealing their funds. Hundreds of thousands of nerds were affected.

  • The FBI forces Google to provide information on all people who viewed certain of YouTube videos. The reason? Identify a user suspected of money laundering.



This beautiful Roger Ver moment from 2017 will be part of Bitcoin’s history forever.

Why did Roger flip the bird? 🖕

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That’s it for this one—big thanks to Santorini Halving Party who allow us to write Bitcoin Therapy. You support us by supporting them ❤️

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Talk to you next Sunday,


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